Category Archives: okieOLIO
one word
withdrawn. inhibited. reserved.
for most of my life, these words could not be used to describe me. i’ve always been the one that would talk your ear off, plunge headlong into any new adventure, and had no trouble showing emotion. my talkative, open, affectionate personality is, i think, partially due to my family culture, but mostly just…me.
but lately that’s been different. life’s events have compelled me to seal off the my true thoughts and feelings with the excuse of protecting those i love from unpleasant conversations. lack of motivation has eaten away at my productivity, unleashing a steady stream of self-scolding that won’t allow much fun-with-friends time until i shape up. feeling disconnected has led me to reach out less, write less, speak up less.
somewhere along the way i’ve become timid and reticent–to the detriment of my relationships, my professional goals, my personal ambitions, and my spiritual growth.
but, oh, how i love a fresh start. blank notebooks, the start of a road trip, clean laundry.
while i’ve never set a new year’s resolution with any earnestness, i’ve always enjoyed the motivated, energized air that surrounds the turning over of a new year.
there is a small online movement of inspired people choosing one word to sum up goals for the new year. the one word 365 community has come together to encourage each other in focusing on one word for 2012 that “becomes the filter through which you see and live your life. It steers your decisions and guides your steps…a word that can be a reminder, a nudge. A word that you can reflect on, that will challenge you, that will inspire you…”
like my friend megan, it seemed as if my word chose me, rather than the other way around. it’s been ducking in and out of my thoughts and prayers for awhile now, just waiting for me to acknowledge it and give it a place in my heart. i think i’m ready to do that.
my one word for 2012 is SHARE.
at first i was hesitant to use the word that has become a ubiquitous online button linked to every social media platform you can imagine. (oh no, now I’ve put the association into your head, too!) …but, ultimately, it is the word that best describes the way i need to stretch myself this year.
so while there will be some clicking of the online “share” button for me, mostly i want this year to be about being less restrained in areas that i have become closed off.
i will SHARE my stories and not let insecurities make me hesitant to write.
i will SHARE compliments instead of only thinking nice things about others.
i will SHARE my sadness with my husband and family rather than letting it build up inside.
i will SHARE in others’ joys and sorrows and not withhold support i could offer.
i will SHARE my aspirations with others who might be able to give advice and accountability.
i will SHARE my knowledge and talents with those who might benefit from my experiences.
i will SHARE my faith struggles with God even if i feel distant in prayer.
my hope is that this focus will help me live my life on purpose and reach more aggressively toward my goals for the coming year. 2012 is the year i reclaim the real me.
available. expressive. unselfish.
image via david-ogaga
okieOLIO is three!
depending on what method you use to read this blog, you may or may not have noticed that i gave my bloggy a face lift to celebrate three years of existence.
for it’s first birthday it received its very own URL, but for it’s second birthday i was a bit distracted and barely recognized the date. so i thought i should make it up to my poor neglected weblog this year with a whole new look…even if it is a bit belated.
it’s hard to believe it was three years ago that i started posting thoughts on this-and-that to the world wide web. although the last year has been the hardest with regard to opening up my heart and head to this online journal, that doesn’t mean that i enjoy any less the interaction and sharing through this medium. i’m looking forward to a more consistent, varied, and fun fourth year.
thanks for hanging with me!
terrible twos?
today this blog turned two years old. it’s my two-year anniversary as a hobby-blogger, and true to the stereotypical signs of this developmental stage, my posts have shown unpredictable mood changes and tantrums…well, maybe not-so-much the tantrums, but i’ve certainly been terrible at getting my thoughts banged out here in my second year, preferring instead the comfort and warmth of the familiar pen and paper during this overwhelming time in my family’s life.
but i miss you, toddler blog, and certainly didn’t forget your birthday. hopefully we can spend more time together soon.
this season
this season is precious. nothing holds more value than the time spent growing and celebrating the most important relationships – Christ and family topping the list. unexpected and spontaneous opportunities are especially special when time with a loved one is threatened.
this season is chaotic. native okies are often comfortable in the face of twister season. there’s a sort of reassuring acceptance in knowing that being aware, prepared, and smart ensures that you’ll make it out okay, even if all your worldly possessions are destroyed. but as i watch debris from my surroundings swirling in every direction, i think the calm i feel is less about familiarity and more because i’m located precisely in the eye of the storm.
this season is memorable. heightened awareness sharpens the senses. mundane memories do not exist when every activity is captured in mental hi-def and stored meticulously for frequent reference.
this season is full. there’s busy, and then there’s a bulging schedule so stuffed that it could bust a seam at any moment. every tunnel has a light beckoning at the other end, but this one must be built on a curve or something, ‘cuz it’s not in sight yet.
this season is fragile. the balance is stable, yet delicate. one good shake could could cause everything to topple and shatter. threatened health, untended relationships, deferred business, and carefully controlled emotions all become more vulnerable to breakage the longer their foundation is strained.
this season is hopeful. hope that is bright and optimistic, like anticipating your number to be drawn from the hopper. not the hope that is filled with anxious dread, like crossing your fingers before stepping onto the rickety bridge. hope that is born from faith.
now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. hebrews 11:1
